There’s no more beautiful feeling than finishing a project you started – finally getting a degree, seeing an excellent examination result, dotting the last sentence of a writeup, ending a successful tenure.. I could go on.
Today my fellowship’s Evangelism week came to an end and I’m so glad it went so well. Of course, God started it and finished it.
Few months back, I slowly started regretting accepting the responsibility of coordinating Evangelism.
What do I know about preaching to people?
I don’t even know the Bible so much
I solemnly promised myself:
Next year Precious you’re rejecting any such duty. You’re not ready for leadership.
But hey, She came, she saw, she conquered… Yaaay.
I decided to make out a list of things I learnt from taking out this position:
- We Judge too fast: I pride myself in being understanding and empathic of people’s decisions and actions. I’m that annoying friend that would make excuses for the person you’re ranting to me about. Turns out, I’m not as understanding afterall. During one of the Evangelism rounds, I paired people to go visiting and I personally picked my partner randomly. While we were leaving together, she started speaking in Jenifaric English and I could feel my tummy suppress and my chest constrict – I couldn’t breathe anymore. If you don’t know, mimicking Jenifa is one thing I do not like. I began to regret my partner choice.
She kept on talking about everything and anything and when she started criticising a particular religious sect I decided I didn’t like her one bit (don’t judge me for judging her hun). Then she stopped to buy corn and told the woman, “Enikan duro de wa”, which means there’s someone waiting for us. My brain screamed, “Liar! We’re going to evangelize.”
Turns out, this girl really is an amazing, deep Christian. I was wrong, judged her too fast, disliked her too early and I’m glad I met someone so cool.
- There are beautiful People– What else can I use to describe people who sacrificed time, money, energy and their all to make the week a success? Members of my fellowship who had so many obligations including final year students with projects and a friend with swollen eyes. They supported all through and helped to bring smiles on people’s faces. And my amazing classmates who gave out despite the recession for the orphanage visit, Sighs! Beautiful people everywhere.
- Leadership involves sacrifice: At this moment, I’m tempted to shout “I swear”. There were points I got frustrated of life dealing me hard blows of stress and moments I had to forgo certain important events to me.
Had to ask Chi, “Sometimes I wonder how my life would be if I was just a student, no church excoship, no LSS position, no L and D, no chess and every other thing I’m engaged in I can’t remember rn. Would I be happier? Better academically? Less stressed and worried?”
He says, “I don’t think *YOU* would. Almost certain you would be more stressed n worried…” (directly copied from whatsapp)
Of course, he’s right. I’d die of doing nothing.
I think the greatest test of Leadership wasn’t just my trying so hard to arrive before anyone else (I ended up failing though) but was at the Orphanage visit today.
Am I a hypocrite for shrinking back for a few seconds when that little skinny kid with sores and scars ran to hug me before I carried him up?
Am I pitiful for being scared I’d catch a disease when the sicklooking kids touched me?
Am I weak for needing one very big hug in the presence of suffering and pain?
Is it disappointing that I cried when I should have stood tall like the view of underfed sick children didn’t faze me?
I do not know. I’m still learning to be a leader.